


Crushed Dreams

by Erwin_Smith



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Kind of.... - Freeform, M/M, Pre-Canon, eruri - Freeform, uhhh it takes place during Mikasa's story in Lost Girls
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-22
Updated: 2018-02-22
Packaged: 2019-03-22 08:56:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 703
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13760658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Erwin_Smith/pseuds/Erwin_Smith
Summary: He was the only soldier that got to see the real Erwin. The real Erwin that always put up a stone wall around his emotions when he was around others. A few times over the past year the wall crumbled away completely, leaving Erwin a mess and Levi to pick up the pieces. Levi was always there to pick up the pieces.





	Crushed Dreams

**Author's Note:**

> Last month I read the light novel version of Lost Girls and was inspired by Mikasa's story—the part in her dream where the gates got sealed off so the Survey Corps couldn't go on missions anymore. I immediately thought of Erwin and well...you'll see.
> 
> Got around to writing this Sunday night, so once again gaining the motivation to write this took like a month to do.
> 
> Thank you again to momtaku for looking this over for me. (︶ε︶*)

Erwin was sitting at his desk the whole time while Levi cleaned the office and bedroom. His hands were folded in his lap and his head was hung in defeat. His eyes were focused on no particular spot on his desk. It looked like it was even a struggle for him to keep looking there. He wanted to drag himself to his bed and close his eyes. Levi offered to change the sheets for him anyway. A nice fresh change of sheets so he could move his moping there.

Levi was the only one he let his guard down around. Erwin trusted him enough to do so after their bond quickly formed. He was the only soldier that got to see the real Erwin. The real Erwin that always put up a stone wall around his emotions when he was around others. A few times over the past year the wall crumbled away completely, leaving Erwin a mess and Levi to pick up the pieces. Levi was always there to pick up the pieces. Including today.

Today all of the gates were sealed shut; government’s orders. The Survey Corps was getting dissolved. They would be no more in a matter of time, not to mention forgotten. The nobles were tired of dishing out money to a cause that continued to fail and lose too many soldiers. They were tired of wasting money on such a worthless cause. Too many people were dying under Commander Shadis’s command. The citizens were losing too much hope. It was almost as if  _ someone’s _ wish came true. The nobles and angry citizens certainly got their wish, then. They got to continue to live like animals trapped inside of a cage.

Levi came back into the office from the bedroom. Erwin didn’t notice as Levi walked up to the desk and removed the white handkerchief from his mouth and tucked it into his pocket. He placed the duster on the floor, leaning against the desk and went around by Erwin. Erwin didn’t register the feeling of Levi’s hand on his shoulder until he spoke.

“Hey.” Levi’s voice was light, his expression bordering concern and unhappiness. It pained him to see Erwin like that. It always pained him. Even more so at that moment. He never seen Erwin that genuinely  _ unhappy _ . It was nothing like the times before.

“The gates, Levi,” Erwin mumbled. He kept his head down. “How are we supposed to fight titans?” He swallowed thickly and balled his hands into fists. “How are we supposed to be free of this hell if we cannot go outside them anymore? How am I supposed to—” Erwin felt the lump forming in his throat. He looked up at Levi, tears entering his icy blue eyes. “My father’s dreams…”

Levi felt his heart cracked at the sight. “Those filthy pigs in Sina can’t keep them sealed for long. They’re stupid cowards. They’ll come squealing just like the pigs they are when they’re worried and tired and wanting us to save their asses so they can be free.”

Erwin sniffled and Levi pulled him into an embrace, almost just like he did the day Erwin told him about his father’s death and what it meant to him. Learning about the dreams his father had, and what he was killed for was Erwin’s greatest dream. The only way was to eliminate the titans, but now that opportunity was gone. Erwin knew he wasn’t going to get to learn if there was an ocean many, many miles away if the government really manipulated people’s minds once long ago to forget the past, and if there were people living free somewhere further out. After all, Erwin blamed himself for his father’s death. If he wouldn’t have been a foolish boy…

The side of his head pressed against Levi’s chest. Erwin sniffled as fat tears rolled down his cheeks and dripped onto the floor or Levi’s shirt. Levi simply rubbed his fingers up and down Erwin’s back in a soothing manner, allowing him to break once more so he could pick up the pieces for him.

_ If you were Commander this wouldn’t have happened, _ Levi wanted to whisper to him.  _ You could have saved us all. _

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave feedback and kudos!
> 
> Tumblr: [commander-erwin-smith](http://commander-erwin-smith.tumblr.com/)


End file.
